Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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