bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
