Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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