return my video game
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
