I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
