therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize