Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
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