On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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