Sponge bath it is.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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