question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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