just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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