What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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