? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
he shaved USA in his pubs
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
