Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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