So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
