So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
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