The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
