"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
