So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
