just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
