at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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