I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
