K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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