i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
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Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
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THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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