if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
