i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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