i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
