Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
