I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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