so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
