six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
