So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
