she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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