can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
