We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
we're so committed to being not committed
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize