i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
