I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
