Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Randomize
