This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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