What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
