I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
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I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
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Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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