Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
