Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
