My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
