he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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