nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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