I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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