walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fence marks all over my body
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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