just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
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It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
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I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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