Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
