K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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